what's yours?

Two days ago i bought a post secret book. overwhelmed with excitement, i turned the cover page and found a written secret next to the title of the book;

Today was the first time i skipped, and its deffinitely not my last!

at first i thought it was printed, but i sniffed and i could smell the ballpoint and i could feel the jagged trace of writings at the back. 

i was happy -> i felt complete.

decipher this; easy

5 times. 

2 weeks. 

uncountable graphics.

mellifluous yet witty comments. 

still in love. sigh.

my legs have definitely been amputated. 

clone him, please.

move over bloom, ROBERT PATTINSON is taking over my heart slowly and painfully. 

honestly, even i found this obsession so absurd. i have never been this preoccupied with a celebrity before. yes, i think orlando bloom is hot. but to prove you wrong, i have never downloaded a handful of pictures of him off the net. on the other hand, all my friends have witnessed how pattinson is taking over all the technologies i own - handphone, laptop, my mechanic brain (?). haa stop me now, or i will literally break my legs from falling in love with him. 

on the lighter note, twilight. probably on countless number of female blogs lately. a vampire who fell in love with a human. cliche story, predictable ending. yet i read the book and felt immense connection to it. i started thinking about what type of guy i like and i found most in this particular character, edward cullen that is. here is the list (not in order):

1. introvert -  if i were to pick one out of a group, i would probably go for the one who sits nicely in the corner, listening to what other guys have to boast about. 
2. polite - must know how to treat a woman. MUST.
3. looks - doesn't have to be overly beautiful nor charming. but good.
4. passionate - either about loving me, or about anything. i love a guy who has something he can talk about with fire in his eyes. 
5. optimistic
6. protective - i love jealousy in a guy, but not in excess. i love someone who can be jealous but still can laugh about it. 
7. mature - edward is obviously mature enough to know his responsibilities and consequences. 
8. romantic - no poets or roses, but surprise me :)
9. mysterious - what more can i say? unambiguity bores me. 
10. intelligent - i want to be able to talk about my complicated thoughts in my complex mind without him staring at me blankly. 
11. good taste - in clothes, car, music. 
12. dance - slow dance from side to side is dull, stupefy me with his moves ;)
13. EYES - rob pattinson has the nicest set of eyes, very intricate yet beautiful. 
14. strong - no superman. strong enough to carry me at least. 
15. bone structure - sounds scary, but i want to be able to trace his jawline with my finger. 

... long list, eh? ill add to it when i can think of more. sounds like the average list any girl would want, but i think i would want it a tad more. 

for you

mungkin kau tak menyadari

ku selalu memandangmu

namun tak terucap kata

saat kau ada di dekatku 

andai saja, kau membaca

rahasia isi di hatiku 

setiap saat, setiap waktu

kucoba tepis bayangmu

namun aku tak berdaya

kau selalu indah untukku 

andai saja, kau membaca

rahasia isi di hatiku

mungkinkah kau kumiliki 

seperti mimpiku, seperti khayalku 

namun ku tak sanggup ungkapkan 

ini menyiksaku, melemahkan hatiku

sampai kapan ku bertahan

tuk memendam perasaan

i read my previous post and fell deep into a hole full of jumbled up letters. i couldn't understand what i was trying to say. 

h.e.l.p. my mind is playing games with me.