let me paint the colour spectrum on you.

me:

... bt why the change of attitudess ?

friend:

fuck it. Cause im pretendin to be a nice sweet guy n shit. When i should just be me, right?

me:

well which one are you? cus ure a sweeeeettttheaaaaarrtt to me, __ and __.

friend:

really? hmm.. i dont know. I think i have an identity crisis.

He's not the only one confuzzled. Sometimes I get lost too, deciding which journey to take or the prime choice.

Who am i?

I want to be graceful with an elegant stance, yet carefree with peculiar effects to my walk.

I would love to be NOISY - full of babbles, but one and the same: composed and secretive girl.

Unique and ordinary.

Come hither attitudes but no hussy.

Independent + pampered.

Perceptive but also ignorant to demands.

I want to be this and that.

Someone said to me once that I can be whatever and whoever I want to be. Whether that is girly or tomboy or gentle or irritating. I used to take that as a compliment. Who does not want that much variety in their life? Although I've come to terms that it is so so tiring. How do you fit multiple photos into one frame? All you see are small snapshots, clustered. I feel like a 'lock and key' enzyme, trying to fit my personalities around other individuals. And no! I'm not a people pleaser - more like a natural habit.

Jealous of the cliques or at least people who know and understand themselves. Someone who has picked their own brand and build it up from scratch. While on the other hand, I am stuck as the chameleon who changes its colours according to its environment.